2 Corinthians 12:9

"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." 2 Corinthians 12:9 If you don't know, many of my writings each day come from the daily Bible reading that I do. Usually something strikes me and sits with me for a while as I statr my morning. After my prayer generally a verse will come to life a bit and I will place an apllication around it and that becomes the subject of the Blog. I enjoy when this happens. I know this is how the Spirit works in my life and I am thankful for that. Today I was in 2 Corinthians 12. This is the Apostle Pauls second letter to the Church at Corinth and in this section he is speaking to them about the "thorn" he was given so as not to become conceited by the visions and revelations that he has recieved from the Lord. He actually calls them surpassingly great revelations. So he has this thorn, something that keeps him in a place where he just doesn't get to full of himself as an Apostle. His words are that it is a messenger of satan, to torment him. Paul indicates that this torment brought him three times to the Lord, pleading for it to be removed from him. the response that he recieved was the verse that I have above, 2 Corinthians 12:9, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Probably not what Paul wanted to hear. Basically, "no" the thorn will remain and you will need to rely on me, the Lord. So I thought about this for a bit. Not so much about the Lords grace but more about His power made perfect in weakness. Bieng weak, what is that? Images of this past year came to mind. How many times I got the "ache". How many times I just wanted to quit and go home to my easy life. Is this the weakness that the Lord makes reference to with Paul. When I had nothing else, noone else to turn to so I tuirned to Him. That bothered me. How could this actually mean that only when things became so bad did I need to turn to Him. In my self I did not like to see that I may have used the Lord as a parachute. This must mean more, have more depth then just come to me when you have nowhere else to turn and I will fix it. See, Bonhoeffer would call this "cheap grace." Because you expect the Lord to be faithful, you only look to Him in desperation, as a parachute. Is my walk just this cheap grace? Have I come to Him only when I was weak. Dig deeper. I thought about my situation now, feeling comfortable and in a good place with the Lord. I am not having significant moments of Spirtual bliss but the "ache" of home is gone, I am on good ground in my walk. I am reading, and doing a Bible study. I am quite often in fellowship with other Christians. Times are good. However I think, is that because I am away from Him, has my pure dependance on Him left me? Or have I matured to a point of stability here? Have I allowed His Power reign enough in my life that I now have more confidence in His Power? Maybe the parachute analagy would work here. I could imagine the first jumb out of a plane, ho the jumper would be worried if the chute would actually open. Then nine months later, the jumper just jumps with all confidence that the chute will open. the Lords power may be revealed in me through my ease and comfort? I think part of this verse also lends it self to our attitude as a Chritian. That when people see us stand with our chins up, even through struggle, and we testify to the Lord in those moments of what normally would be weakness, then His power is shown to those around us. When there is no other reason for us to be in good spirits other then the Lord working in our lives then He is glorified. So as I write, my internal honesty alarm atarted to ring. This is why I love writing so much. Here it is. I don't know if all of this has taugjht me to rely on Him and therefore that is why I feel so good, His power within me or if I am just so comfortable in my situation now that I am just stagnet and standing still, not putting myself into useful or uncomfortable ituations where I do nedd Him. The ache was a constant reminder to seek Him, the ache being gone leaves questions in my mind. I fear if I am just standing still! I truly want the Lords power in my life. I want to feel Him everyday, working in me, stretching me, drawing me out of this comfortable little box. I know that is when I am most efective for Him, I know that is where I see His grace most real. I can imagine Paul in this instance. He is saying that all of these great things are happening to him and he so easily could become concieted and arogant, so the Lord allows a struggle, and then tells Him what he needs to know. Lord, you speak in many ways to us. Your word, the Bible continues to speak and I am thankful for that. I may not have the conclusion to this, what exactly the answer to my question is but I do know that your word is working on me, that you are leading me to seek the answers, to act. I thank you for that and thank you for your power and grace in my life. Amen