Preperation

I am beginning to prepare for my R&R that is coming up, mentally. It is almost like the anticipation you had when you were a kid regarding Christmas. You would have all these ideas of what things would be like without being one hundred percent positive of what it would be, eager but at the same time nervous. I will also through in a sense of relief to it becasue R&R is definately and opportunity to truly relax and let go of the work that we do here.

I am anxious, but not in a bad way, because I want so desperately to see the ones I love, Catherine and the kids. I want to just enjoy their company, to look at their faces when they speak, not just hear their voices. I want to see my children smile and laugh. I want to smell my wifes perfume and hold her when I sleep. To have my family near and real rather then just images in my mind.

I look forward t0o seeing my friends, the people that are closest to me. My Brothers whom I fellowship with. These are the people that have strengthened me as I have been here, who either on purpose or inadvertantly have helped my grow. They have held me up and held me accountable through my toughest times.

I look so forward to returning to my Church family. Even though my time here is to serve the troops, the real purpose is to grow in the Lord. The draw on my heart is to return with a message. To come back with my experiences and to share them for the benefit of the congregation. My time here has always been bigger then just here, it has been about God and that should not be just mine, that must be shared.

I even look forward to the cold. To stand outside and breath in the crisp air and let it sting my lungs. To stand outside in the quietness of a snow storm, hearing the snow flakes as they touch the ground.

So many things I can think of that I would love to do. So many people that I want to see, and so little time. The time as I said must be worth it, both from here and on R&R. I see it also in a way as a Mission Trip and not just a return home. Catherine and I will balance family and friends, but my heart is everyday, church. Everyday can be spent in the lifting of someone, the speaking of a message. I pray now for that message.

Today is Sunday, and today I have planned to clean my travel bag and to prepare my documentation. To think of the things I will need and the timing of my trip. It is still two weeks away but you can never be too ready.

Lord Jesus, begin to prepare my heart now, release my burdons and begin to shift my focus toward my work at home. Allow the SPirit to rest in me as I prepare to rest. No stress, no worries, no matters, just confidence in you and the good works that will be done at my home. Amen.