Hope In The Unseen

"24 For in this hope we are saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? 25 But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience."

Romans 8:24-25

Yesterday, actually yesterday and the day before yesterday, I was in a funk.  Not self pitty or condemnation or anything like that but just sitting in a little darkness.  It stemmend from a couple of complaints from two of my Drivers here about me to HR.  What resulted from the complaints was an investigation from HR of the circumstances of the complaints.  What made it worse is that the complaints really came down to two man that don't want to do what they came here to do and they used HR as a tool to get their way.  Don't get me wrong, I encourage employees to go to HR if they feel it necessary, but in that I expect that HR will appropriately handle the situation.  Yes, appropraiately becomes ones perspective, but the HR here sole purpose is to protect the Companies liability. With this I was told by HR that when there is an issues they first look at what the Supervision did wrong. 

So anyway, satan hit me in my prideand I just was thrown off by this a bit.  I wasn't worldly and maintained my composure through the whole thing.  I just didn't have any joy that I noramally do.  I was just stagnet in a way, in disbelief of the handling of the situation and in that not looking to Him like I do most times.  Now this doesn't mean I didn't trust that He was there with me.  It doesn't mean that I forsook Him or thought that I was seperated from Him, the whoois me thing.  I was just sitting with my head down I guess. I spoke with Him alot.  Even appologized for being mopey and down, but I didn't look up from the funk.  Just slowly allowed things to work themselves out and waited, I guess.

Yesterday, the camp Manager came back and I expressed in a meeting my frustration in what was going on.  I told him I was getting beat up by the situation and that I was not going to do anything that would add fuel to the fire with HR.  Later in another meeting, he confirmed my descisions and position and from what I could tell was backing me up with HR and the men.  They are expected to do the job they came here to do and work the hours they are getting paid for.  This became a catalyst for change in me.  Not a quick change but at least change.  I felt confident enough in my original descions that I could at least let that part of the situation go.

Today I am back in the swing of things.  Catherine helped out alot and encouraged me through various means yesterday.  I also got a good boost from Sethh who I have been eating dinner with every night.  We have been using the time to encourage each other as we are both short on time.  In the evening, the I Am Second group met and that turned into a very good meeting after starting off rather slowly.  Last evening as I lay in bed I again turned my thoughts toprayer and began to truely move past the the little period as I gave it up to Him.  This morning with my devotions and some additional prayer I am back in a good frame of mind and feeling well.

In yesterdays post I tried to describe the feelings that I was having.  I can remember in my past feeling tottally helpless, this was not it. In factlike I had said, I know He is there, just waiting for me to trust in Him again.  I know exactly what needs to be done in these situations but I just didin't do it.  He is faithful and I am the broken one, so it is me that waivers, it is me looking at the waves.  So once He, and others pulled me out of the waves abit, I took a breath and got back into the boat with Christ this time. 

So after all this I will get to the verse at hand.  What we hope in.  I unfortuanately in a lot of ways hope now to go home and start the next part of this journey.  I hope to take this year and make it matter for more then just me.  I hope that I can leave here and have left a mark here, that my time here also mattered for something, but these hopes are in essence the ones that I have, the ones that are seen.  I know that I have changed.  I know that I have touched people.  I know that I will return home.  These things I know, but what I need to do is not hope in those things at all, only in the Lord jesus and the guidance of the Spirit within me.

Catherine said yesterday that satan is trying to rob me of what I have done here.  She was partially right, but satan also can only rob you of the things that you grasp hold of.  He can only change the things seen for the Christian as God will keep the eteranl, He holds the book of life and satan can not rob from that.  So my hope must rest on the unseen, the eternal, and no matter what my, or others perceptions are it will only matter in the end His perspective. 

Lord, may the eteranl remain our primary focus, may we hope in the unseen and therefore rebuke any power satan may think he has.  The worldly things are only temporary and we must look past them with patience.  Amen.